Saturday, May 29, 2010

Saturday Sounds 23 or Breaking Up

My 12yo daughter, E, has a boyfriend. He's someone she has liked for a while and they have been "going out" for 3 weeks now. Her Face Book profile picture is a photo of them holding hands as they walk away from the camera. Very cute. They spend a lot of time texting each other and she had her first slow dance with him. I would like to tell more, but E has asked me not to, and she doesn't want me to post her FB picture. Darn. I would love to gossip more about her love life!

Hus thought that I should be more worried about this relationship. When I asked what he meant by that, he told me he was worried about what will happen when it ends. I told him that he was right in worrying, and I'll have to make sure she has a lot of sad songs to listen to while she cries.

I remember listening to the same sappy, pathetic love songs over and over and over, while I cried and cried until I couldn't cry anymore. Until my eyes were swollen shut, my nose plugged and my cheeks sticky and rashy. Some songs I played thousands of times (I had a lot of break-ups) like Barry Manilows "Weekend in New England", Bonnie Tylers "Total Eclipse of the Heart", and this song, which by the way came out when I was around 4yo, but I didn't have my first boyfriend until I was 10. Weird. I had the 45 record. I still get all gulpy in my throat when I hear it, but I can't cry, because while crying was therapeutic when I was young, it now just gives me a headache.

What songs did/do you cry too when you're sad?

Sorry I haven't been around to visit much lately, I've been tired and actually kind of depressed, damn it! I'm trying hard to snap out of it.


The Empress said...

OK, here goes: but are you ready? I fear this story will just knock that depression right out of you.

The effect may only last for 6 mins., so just keep going back and reading

Gulp. I can't believe I'm going to tell you this, but it's for you, mah girl. (why do I love you so much????)

So, I had this unbelievable unrequited crush on Tom March. The year is 1973, and he has the long blonde hair parted down the middle with the leather headband across the forehead. He wears tight corduroy Levi's with striped Levi shirts with oystershell snap buttons.

He is tall.

He is thin.

He is smart.

He totally cannot stand the sight of me.

He tells my girlfriend, "Not if she were the last person on earth would I go out with that. She looks like a mix between Olive Oyl and a chihuahua."

We live in a solid white neighborhood and my family are/is the ONLY hispanics for Miles. FOR.MILES.

When I hear what he's said, I can barely breathe. I can barely walk home. I know see this was severe depression now. I was ugly, I was skinny, I was flat, I had a big nose and a hairy upper lip and a unibrow.

Dear God, could it get much worse???

So, I went to my sister's house, who always had BEER BEER and MORE BEER in the house. SHe worked all day. I had keys.

I took a 6 pack out, I was in 8th grade, and I proceeded to carry the 6 pack by the cozy plastic rings that held the cans together and walk down the alley drinking the cold beer as fast as I could to get drunk.

I vomited like crazy, forgot all about Tom March, and only thought about the deal I made with God that if he helped me stop peuking my guts out, I'd behave but please dear god make it stop.

TRUE ENDING: years and years later I run into Tom March as a freshman in college, in Mass Com 101. I have become Smokin' hot. SMOKIN'.

I am as perfect as perfect can get and all the white boys from highschool now in college have grown sick and tired of the white girls they've dated for 4 years..

I am a wanted woman on campus.

My hair is long looooooooooong and thick, my skin is brown, I am tall and tight, and my eyes as dark as any white boy has seen.

Yeah. His pupils dilate when he sees me walk in the class.

My one line back to him when he tries to smalltalk? "Sorry, I'm dating a grad student."

The Empress said...

Oh! And the song that breaks my heart to this day, so that I can't even swallow my throat gets so tight?(why tell you, I dont' want the depression kicking in again...)

Aw, hell:

It's Sinead O'Connor's "Nothing you.."

Go ahead, YouTube it, if you must...just in case you 're only in mild depression and need a slight nudge to orange alert level.

Barb said...

On the day my grandmother died I went downstairs to the basement and played my 45 of Precious and Few by Climax over and over and over... about 12 hours... while I cried my heart out.

But I think the saddest song ever would have to be I'm So Lonesome I Could Cry by Hank Williams.

doggie mamma said...

ok Empress - I love you - you are hilarious...

hey, I've been a bit depressed these days too - why don't you come for a visit and we can cry over old songs? Kidding, come visit and we can see the sights of the city and drink wine...good cry songs? eh? how about "follow you, follow me" by Genesis? and "Endless Love?" by Lionel Ritchie and Diana Ross? "Forever young?" can't remember who sang that - "Faithfully" by Journey, "every breath you take" the Police, - wow I sure did cry alot as an angst teen!!!! LOVE TO E!

Suzy said...

I was okay until I started reading the comments.

I bought an old Disco compilation CD when I was on the road to some gig years and years ago.

The song that slayed me was by Tavares ~ Heaven Must Be Missing An Angel.

And Empress? Great story. I think every woman has one of those. Because I think we come in to our own as we age. Although none of us has actually aged or anything.

Wishing 4 One said...

Against all odds- Phil Collins...

When I was in 7th grade, i had my first real crush. It was on a puerto rican thug, i mean kid, that i met at the skating rink. My friends and I would go every friday night, not having a ride back home, but so what, just so I could see him.

He was a deliquent, in and out of juvi, but i liked him so much. That stupid song always played every Friday.

I bet he ended up a serial killer or some kind of criminal for sure. It lasted all of like three months I think LOL!

Ma said...

Oh lord - such heart-rending stories! Me? I married the guy I fell for at age 15 when I was 21 and divorced him 13 years later. Not all that heart-rending...

BUT, that being said, I had my high school ups and downs with him, and this is the song that always was my go-to misery accompaniment for those times. I still love it.

Anonymous said...

Oooh, Endless Love was a good one. I can't remember many others from high school. From college: All Cried Out, Nobody Knows (Tony Rich), When Can I See You (Babyface).