I'll start from the beginning. On Saturday, E and I went to Boston with E's drama club to see How the Grinch Stole Christmas the Musical. We arrived on time to the grade school, 8:30AM, for bus pick up. We were immediately informed that the bus was running late because the roads were slippery where he was coming from. Okay, no big deal, E and I got into a friends van to hang out and wait.We waited and waited and waited, finally after an hour the bus showed up.
We all gasped as the 200 year old bus driver stepped out of the bus and limped into the grade school to take a ten minute pee trip.
The ride to Boston was pretty uneventful, a little snow fell in through the roof vents, but it wasn't' over my seat, so whatever. There was boring scenery and stomach lurching winding roads,but I don't get carsick, so whatever. We arrived about 10 minutes before the show was to start. Before the bus stopped to let us out, Mr. Bossy,not his real name, one of the drama coaches took a hold of the microphone so he could start bossing, I mean telling us what to do. He told everyone that they had to leave all of their electronic devices including cell phones on the bus or shut them off. Fine, I shut mine off, but I would have a real problem leaving it in the bus, say if for some crazy reason, the bus took off without me and I ended up stuck without a phone. Next he told us to go to the bathroom on the bus because we weren't' going to have time to go in the theater before the show starts. Yeah, right. Last, he told everyone they had to leave their coats on the bus because we were just getting out and crossing the street to the theatre. I told E she could leave hers on if she wanted, I am just rebellious like that. However, E is not rebellious, and she left her coat on the bus. I didn't' care about my coat as I avoid wearing one as much as possible. It was only 20 degrees Fahrenheit outside. We piled out of the bus, half the people wearing coats, and made it into the theatre without anyone dying of hypothermia.
Of course when we got into the theatre, half of us snuck off to the restrooms! E pleaded with me not to go because we were "not supposed to!" Heh heh. When we got into the bathroom we met up with many other rebellious chaperone's including Mr. Bossy's companion. Poor guy, even she didn't listen to him.
We all gasped as the 200 year old bus driver stepped out of the bus and limped into the grade school to take a ten minute pee trip.
The ride to Boston was pretty uneventful, a little snow fell in through the roof vents, but it wasn't' over my seat, so whatever. There was boring scenery and stomach lurching winding roads,but I don't get carsick, so whatever. We arrived about 10 minutes before the show was to start. Before the bus stopped to let us out, Mr. Bossy,not his real name, one of the drama coaches took a hold of the microphone so he could start bossing, I mean telling us what to do. He told everyone that they had to leave all of their electronic devices including cell phones on the bus or shut them off. Fine, I shut mine off, but I would have a real problem leaving it in the bus, say if for some crazy reason, the bus took off without me and I ended up stuck without a phone. Next he told us to go to the bathroom on the bus because we weren't' going to have time to go in the theater before the show starts. Yeah, right. Last, he told everyone they had to leave their coats on the bus because we were just getting out and crossing the street to the theatre. I told E she could leave hers on if she wanted, I am just rebellious like that. However, E is not rebellious, and she left her coat on the bus. I didn't' care about my coat as I avoid wearing one as much as possible. It was only 20 degrees Fahrenheit outside. We piled out of the bus, half the people wearing coats, and made it into the theatre without anyone dying of hypothermia.
Of course when we got into the theatre, half of us snuck off to the restrooms! E pleaded with me not to go because we were "not supposed to!" Heh heh. When we got into the bathroom we met up with many other rebellious chaperone's including Mr. Bossy's companion. Poor guy, even she didn't listen to him.
While we were meandering about the theater, I noticed that there were small alcoves here and there with private parties going on. I also noticed that many people were dressed up. I thought of the matinee we went to last year with the drama club in NYC. Almost everyone there was wearing jeans. Not so much in Boston.There were also cash bars located at every level, E seriously begged me not to get a drink, so I didn't. A choice I regret.
Our seats were about a quarter of a mile away in the last rows of the Balcony and I forgot my binoculars. As for the show, it was great. I am a huge Dr. Seuss fan, and even painted a Dr. Seuss fence on my living room wall, and tell everyone I went to the same high school as him. Of course not at the same time. The costumes were fun and the songs fabulous.
After the show, several of us stood in line so we could purchase $35 T shirts. The T's in NYC were $20. Yes, I am insane, but felt pressure, I know, crazy, I really don't want to talk about it.
We got back on the bus and proceeded to go back to Vermont. Well, we made it over the border from NH to VT, through Woodstock VT, about an hour away from our destination, when the bus pull over at a gas station."Why are we stopping?" we all asked. After a while Mr. Bossy got on the horn and told us that the bus driver just noticed we were low on gas and he wasn't comfortable going further without getting more. Okay, we are at a gas station,no big, right? WRONG! There was no diesel fuel at this station. And to make things more scary, apparently this bus had no emergency road side assistant plan, huh? Being that I was toward the back of the bus, I couldn't hear exactly what was going on but I heard a rumor that the State police were called, the town police where we were headed were phoned and supposedly the town we were stuck in Bridgewater was not going to help us. Great. I don't know what finally happened but after about a half an hour we were told that gas was on the way. Yay! But the gas didn't arrive for another two hours!!! In the meantime people were getting ornery. At one point I was scared that I, I mean, WE were going to go all "Lord of the Flies" set the bus on fire and throw the driver into traffic. Thankfully, I had Xanax with me, which I took, and it helped me realize sending smoke signals would probably be fruitless out here with all the wood stoves around and all. Mr. Bossy did yell at some of the moms because they were really acting over the top angry. I was angry because they didn't give us frequent updates and also because I was just getting into the movie A Sharks Tale, when the bus stopped. The most I did to rebel, was stand up and volunteer to take some of the carsick kids off the bus for fresh air. Another bossy man tried to stop me and asked that we all go out in groups. I said no thank you, I was going out now, it was too hot in the bus, and I was not waiting for a turn to go outside. "You can't keep us from leaving the bus" I said loudly, well quietly anyways. I know the bosses just had every ones safety in mind, but I had to get the fuck out of there, if just for a minute. It was zero out.
Finally the gas arrived we headed out, and well, wouldn't you know, the toilet wouldn't flush. What a piece of crap this bus was. The driver couldn't even figure out how to turn the lights on and off properly. The aisle lights would go on for no reason then off then all the overhead lights would go on. What a dumbass.
Last I heard, from one of the over the top angry moms, was that we were getting a refund for the bus cost. That's good news at least.
Finally the gas arrived we headed out, and well, wouldn't you know, the toilet wouldn't flush. What a piece of crap this bus was. The driver couldn't even figure out how to turn the lights on and off properly. The aisle lights would go on for no reason then off then all the overhead lights would go on. What a dumbass.
Last I heard, from one of the over the top angry moms, was that we were getting a refund for the bus cost. That's good news at least.
$35 T-shirt, which I bought one for T also. I know, I don't want to talk about it.
7 comments:
Good grief! This is totally hilarious, but only b/c it's over and you're safe and thank the gods the geezer driving the bus got you all home.
I love Dr. Seuss, too. My dream is to one day have one of his "adult" paintings. You know, when I win the lottery.
Oh my Gosh, that sounds like a real nightmare, except for the play of course, and the 200 yr old driver? Boy would I be nervous! Glad your safe and sound!
Thank God my day is pretty shitty. I don't feel so alone.
Oh, dear. At least you made it home safely to blog about it!
One of my sisters and my BIL were at that very same show! Their experience was completely different, of course. They only live 30 miles from Boston but they made a weekend out of it. They booked a suite at a nice hotel in the Theater District and stayed Friday and Saturday night so they could also do Boston Common, Faneuil Hall, etc... no Mr Bossy or 200 year old bus driver.
OMG, you are too frickin' funny!
I could just see you being pissed off because you were getting in A Shark's Tale.
I'd say the T-shirt just about says it all?
Glad you got home safe and that they gave you a bus refund.
thnks
You crack me up!
I know someone else who was on that bus and he facebooked that you were stuck on top of a mountain so I was thinking of you all... for a moment. Glad you're all safe!
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