Tuesday, January 18, 2011

The 12 Days of Hus's Unemployment

Sung to the tune of The 12 Days of Christmas


On the first day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
A dust free wood stove mantle.

On the second day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
Two batches no-bakes,
and A dust free wood stove mantle.

On the third day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
Three french loaves,
Two batches no-bakes,
and A dust free wood stove mantle.

On the fourth day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
Four calling friends,
Three french loaves,
Two batches no-bakes,
and A dust free wood stove mantle.

On the fifth day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
Five more coo-ookiiiieeeees!
Four calling friends,
Three french loaves,
Two batches no-bakes,
and A dust free wood stove mantle.

On the sixth day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
Six clean basement shelves,
Five more coo-ookiiiieeeees!
Four calling friends,
Three french loaves,
Two batches no-bakes,
and A dust free wood stove mantle.

On the seventh day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
Seven shoveled pathways,
Six clean basement shelves,
Five more coo-ookiiiieeeees!
Four calling friends,
Three french loaves,
Two batches no-bakes,
and A dust free wood stove mantle.

On the eighth day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
Eight oatmeal cookies,
Seven shoveled pathways,
Six clean basement shelves,
Five more coo-ookiiiieeeees!
Four calling friends,
Three french loaves,
Two batches no-bakes,
and A dust free wood stove mantle.

On the ninth day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
Nine bowls chicken soup,
Eight oatmeal cookies,
Seven shoveled pathways,
Six clean basement shelves,
Five more coo-ookiiiieeeees!
Four calling friends,
Three french loaves,
Two batches of no-bakes,
and A dust free wood burning stove mantle.

On the tenth day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
Ten loads of laundry,
Nine bowls chicken soup,
Eight oatmeal cookies,
Seven shoveled pathways,
Six clean basement shelves,
Five more coo-ookiiiieeeees!
Four calling friends,
Three french loaves,
Two batches of no-bakes,
and A dust free wood burning stove mantle.

On the eleventh day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
Eleven meatballs cooking,
Ten loads of laundry,
Nine bowls chicken soup,
Eight oatmeal cookies,
Seven shoveled pathways,
Six clean basement shelves,
Five more coo-ookiiiieeeees!
Four calling friends,
Three french loaves,
Two batches of no-bakes,
and A dust free wood burning stove mantle.

On the twelfth day of unemployment, my husband gave to me...
Twelve pounds protruding (from my belly)
Eleven meatballs cooking,
Ten loads of laundry,
Nine bowls chicken soup,
Eight oatmeal cookies,
Seven shoveled pathways,
Six clean basement shelves,
Five more coo-ookiiiieeeees!
Four calling friends,
Three french loaves,
Two batches of no-bakes,
and A dust free wood burning stove mantle.

Poor Hus.

5 comments:

Mrs. Irritation said...

You're going to need plastic surgery if this keeps up! :)

Ma said...

Somebody loves you. A lot.

Barb said...

I think I gained a pound or two just reading this.

Vodka Mom said...

I'm sending chips. and vodka.

The Empress said...

So good humored and good natured, this'll carry you...

xo