Tuesday, June 26, 2007

Missing: ONE WIENER

My 4 year old son T and my husband came back inside the house after swimming in our pool one day. The water was cold. T proceeded to strip off his bathing suit and throw it on the floor as per his usual. Then he ran down the hall naked toward the fan in my bedroom. He stood in front of the blowing fan to dry himself off. He looked down at his body and suddenly he yelled...

"Papa, Papa!"
"What Bud?" my hus answered.
"SOMEBODY STOLE MY WIENER!"

Well, my hus just about fell on the floor laughing and went on to explain "Shrinkage" to T.
Since he got such a positive response to "Wiener" T says it all the time now. If I tell him not to, he reminds me that Papa thought it was funny.
At least he is not calling it his "Package" anymore. Or doing the "Package Dance" That was also thanks to my hus. As if T has a package like a rock star. Should I get him some spandex?
And, do all little boys constantly have to have their hand on their package? I am continually reminding him to "stop touching your pee pee in public". It's like he thinks it really will disappear if he is not protecting it.

11 comments:

Suzy said...

I don't think men ever get over their package. When I first moved to NY I started dating a lawyer. One weekend he took me out to the Hampstons to his parents' place.

I was standing in the kitchen with him and his mom and he had his hand in his pants for about 10 minutes adjusting himself. I mentioned it to him later and he had no recollection of doing that.

The Missing Weiner. I see a children's book!!

am1478 said...

so i just lost my comment. anyway, i thought it was cute and funny and agree i don't think they ever get over the package. anyway, i can't make it tonight....i am working. i hate to cancel on you guys, but it worked out better for my family. (different things going on i will have to fill you in soon). anyway, i still want to hang out sometime and it feels nice to be included in something. talk to you soon, me

stefanierj said...

My MIL teaches kindergarten, and every school she has been at has outlawed elastic-waist pants for boys for precisely this reason. Can you imagine what they'd do if they had breasts too??

Andie D. said...

LOL!

My boy looooooves to be naked, and has to make sure anyone near knows he's naked. Runs around, dances, shouts, "Look at ME! I'm NAKED!"

He's hasn't complained about shrinkage yet, but he did let me know when his penis was getting bigger. WHILE WE WERE IN LINE AT THE GROCERY STORE.

Good times.

Granny said...

I dropped over from Alissa's to tell you you're not the only one who has problems seeing pictures. Sometimes I can see half of them but not the others. ??

Then I read your post. Hilarious. My two youngest kids are boys, now 34 & 39. I remember all that very well.

Best,

Ann (aka granny)

hellomelissa said...

that's just hilarious!

they ALWAYS have a hand on the unit, don't they? i am forever saying, "hands off the unit."

Autumn's Mom said...

LOL Reminds me of Toy Story..you know Woody and his pull string. Funny if one of the phrases was "Somebody stole my weiner!"

ok, maybe only I think that's funny.

Jane is Dating said...

too cute- for about a month J was thrilled with her 'vargina'. That's what she called it...I'm trying to figure out how to explain puberty to her- have you started?

Lainey-Paney said...

OMG!
THAT IS SOOOOOO FUNNY.

MY OFFICE MATE & I ARE CRACKING UP.

Denise said...

Here's what I tell my little guy (no pun): "IT'S ATTACHED -- IT WON'T FALL OFF!"

am1478 said...

just wanted to say hello and let you know i was keeping up with your posts. sorry i missed tues. heard it was lots of fun. love, amber