Wednesday, January 27, 2010

#2 Waitress and #4 Phone Sex Operator

21 Jobs in 10 Years Continued...(changed it from 20 to 21 because I forgot about my copy job- "Heidi makin copies...")

#2 Bob's Big Boy Waitress

Being that I was a teenager when I had this job, and not yet taking Lexapro for anger management, waitressing was not a good idea for me. I worked at Bob's for only a few weeks. The first week I thought it was fun with decent money, delicious Big Boy cheeseburgers, fries and chocolate cream pie for dinner, what could be bad? And nope, didn't gain an ounce back then. Now I would gain 5 pounds just looking at chocolate cream pie.

Back then and still today, I sometimes have a problem not pointing out to people when they are being rude. Of course, now as a nurse, and not in a position to allow myself to be fired, I know how to do this tactfully and with respect for the rude persons feelings. Then I just go and bitch about them behind their back.

One night I had a woman who sent back her spaghetti three times. "Too cold" "Too dry" and finally "Just give it to me to go". Seriously busy, and not in the mood, I proceeded to pack up her spaghetti in a take-out container then gave it to her. She left me no tip.

After the woman left,my boss called me over.
"That woman complained about you."she told me.
"Really, why?" I asked.
"You packed her spaghetti in a paper bag."
"Yes, yes I did."

#4 Phone Sex Operator

Back in the '80's, when I lived in California for a short time after dropping out of High School, Temp agencies were a popular and easy way to find employment. I found a few jobs this way including the "copy person" and "phone sex operator".

I was told this was going to be just a regular office-answering phone-type of job. When I got to the office, the manager brought me to a small room which contained a desk, comfy chair and a telephone. On the desk was a typed script of what I was supposed to say when I answered the phone. I quickly, after one call, heh heh, figured out that the job was for a "Swingers" service. The service supposedly was to set swingers up with other swingers for dates. I did my best to follow the script, but the men calling were going off track with questions like "can you go on a date with me?" and "what are you wearing now?" I kept having to cover the mouthpiece of the phone so I could ask the manager what to say. He told me to just "go with it" but that I didn't have to really date these men, but I didn't have to tell the men that either. I couldn't stop imagining these callers as being really really greasy, sleazeballs.Ewe.

Eventually the manager took me around for a tour of the rest of the office. It turned out that the cozy, clean room I was in was just used for orientation/training purposes. The real work took place in a bigger room lined with folding tables at which women sat close together and answered the phones. Ewe.

I'm not a prude and porn and phone sex is-A Okay, but watching those women and girls, me only 18, gave me the willies.

Needless to say, I didn't get the job.

Next #10 Certified Balloon Specialist and #8 Envelope Addressing Person.

6 comments:

Suzy said...

I don't get the paper bag thing.

But then again, I'm off Lexapro too.

Brian Miller said...

wow. nothing was going to satisfy that woman.

i met a phone sex operator once. it really is a funny story. i will have to tell it sometime.

Anonymous said...

I have never been a waitress for good reason. I think I would suck and end up dumping a plate of noodles on top of someone's head. People are rude, stupid and annoying. I am not the kind of person to put on a happy face and push on. A good wait person is awesome and I am always awed at their ability that I seriously lack.

Wishing 4 One said...

I did a banquent job once while in High School, dropped a whole tray of champagne in the foyer, in front of all the guests. I went into the backroom, took off my clothes and left. Did not even collect my pay later. Oh i am so clumsy even now. That phone sex job sounds creepy as shit man, eeeww.

BabyonBored said...

Um, when are you going to talk about the clothing store job on Melrose? And when are we going to out you from my book? And we need to discuss a mutual friend of ours. Email me. HI HON.

Unknown said...

I just got done reading your article, and really enjoyed it, thank you. Here is a really fun book and audio that just came out about a real full time phone sex operator that wrote a book called: “Pillow Talk: A Glimpse Into the Calls to a Phone Sex Operator”. You can also find this at fun2readybooks-com