If I live to be 85 I will...
-Start smoking cigarettes again.
-Eat chocolate cake every morning with my coffee.
-Learn how to play the drums.
-Take my sleeping pill and try to stay awake.(Oh, I already do that)
-Drop the F*bomb every other sentence, especially when talking with my grandchildren.
-Stop going to the dentist, unless he'll just let me inhale some nitrous for a few minutes.
-Trade my station wagon for a motorcycle.(One with a side car so I can take Hus with me)
-Buy a cane so I can hit people with it.
-Switch the covers on my DVDs to covers from Porn movies.
-Smoke pot again.
-Have a Pharming Party with all drugs from my friends medicine cabinets.
-Try Ecstasy. ("Hey grandson, don't forget to score me that dime bag and while your at it, pick me up some F*-en Ecstasy too, I'll share." "Yes, Grandma.")
Late Entry: Quit my job!